Tuesday, 1 October 2013

let's talk about adeena...

I'm easily influenced. If I genuinely like you and spend a lot of time with you, after a while you'll start getting comments like, 'Wow, man, Adeena laughs just like you.'
Hmm, Adeena does.
That makes me question who I am sometimes. But then I think about it, and all the people I've ever met have made such an impression on me. All the people I've ever made acquaintance with are probably responsible for who I am today, and I don't know if that's a good or bad thing. But that's just me, I pick up on other people's  habits, and the way they talk, and the way they push their hair back behind their ears, or how they clear their throat before they speak, just things like that, and at one point or the other, they sort of start defining me.
Maybe that's why it hurts me so much when people leave me, I lose a part of myself and for a while I'm just lost, I forget who I am.
I've noticed this about my penmanship, too. It used to be like my science and social studies teacher in 4th grade, and then my English teacher in 5th grade, my mom in 6th grade. And now, it's just a lot more me.
And I can't wait for that to happen to me. I used to be like my friends in 4th grade, then my friends in grades 6 through 8, and in 9, the populars, who happen to be my friends.
But then there's my best friend. My best friend, who I love, but his name's always on my tongue, I'm always thinking about him, and because of him I'm friends with so many more people now, I'm exposed to so many more things, and I'm glad, but I think that's taking away who I am. I depend on him too much.
And I know how that turns out, we get closer, and closer, and I depend on him for everything, he's my go-to person for everything. I'm not sure if that's bad, but I need to meet new people. Just for me, not because I don't want to be friends with him, but because I need to stop depending on others, and I need to start being my own person.


F @ Quirks-and-Irks said...

Everyone has this to a degree, which is probably why certain habits or quirks or whatever become common anyway.. Really inspiring post :)

Adeena said...

Thank you so much