Wednesday, 26 December 2012

I don't really even have that much to say.

Maybe every year at this time, since two years ago, my heart aches for somebody who let me go. Or maybe we let her go. Even the smallest of things has the greatest of impression on my mind, like a glimpse of her in old photos reminds me of how she sat, joking and smiling, hiding all the pain inside, for our sake.
Did she ever really know how much things would change after she left? Did she ever really know how her soul was connected to ours?
Her old clothes, the things she left behind, ring with her scent and I quiver to even think that once they touched her skin.  
Thinking about all she did, all she said, all she experienced, I wonder, would she have wanted to do more? Would it really make a difference, to her or to us?
What if she was here? What if she was alive? Would we have gotten this far, emotionally?
Things have changed too much. And I don't know if that's good or bad.
That's that.

Maybe I do have a lot to say...


Hadia Anjum said...

It's true how in the moments that we are rendered speechless, a flurry of questions may fill the silence. Unanswered, as in the case of someone we've been separated from. And the questions just build up, as you've shown beautifully, until we can come to terms with the answerlessness.

Really liked this.

Adeena said...

Thank you, Hadia! :D